Can you give me some funny jokes that people will like?

Why didn't the life guard save the hippie? Cause he was too far out man.  (:

What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine? Give me my quarterback. (:

I told my doctor that I broke my arm in two places. He told me to stop going to those places.  (:

What did the teddy bear say when offered dessert? No thanks I'm stuffed (that one is one of my nieces favorite)  (: